Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Things I'm thinking

I think human beings are hilarious creatures. We're so full of ourselves sometimes. I really don't understand that.

Okay, I do. I do because I own a blog where I spend a lot of time ranting about things that bother me, all the while, I occupy the moral high ground assuming that my point of view is correct and that everyone else is wrong. That's scary. It's also full of shit.

That being said, I cannot imagine my not having an honest opinion about everything. Can you imagine being that way? I'm not a saint, nor am I wise. I don't see how I can offer up anything that is beyond my own scale of comprehension.

This is precisely the reason why some people upset me on a regular basis. These some people are those who think the moral high ground, and a self-appointed self-righteousness is their birthright. Why? Because they're rich / older / have read more or some other profound reason that provides them an empirical basis on which to establish their superiority. And you know what gets me? They hate being told that someone doesn't like them. Do you know how annoyed they get? It rankles them on a very fundamental level.

I like being the cause of that. And in an instance of what is masochism, I also like being rankled on a very fundamental level.

Let me explain why.

When some core beliefs of yours are questioned and faced with events or facts that prove them wrong or misguided, it's important to take a look at what you believe in. Here's why, change is a good thing. It's good for your health, it's good for your mind, and it's good for the country! [Kidding about that last one, but you never know!]

I enjoy introspection. I like having the time to examine the way I process thoughts and analysing how that process has changed over the years. There was a time when I too moralistic, and too rigid, in how I thought about things and how I approached life itself. I've realised over the years, and after spending time with some epic items, that being that way is only going to cause an explosion in my brain! And I, for one, really like my brain. I can't have it exploding or even going more loopy than it already is.

Introspection has led me to a small-ish epiphany - to be more honest. I'm the least confrontational person I know. I have always hidden from fights and I always end up being the person who ends up crying at the end of a fight because the other person is yelling at me. It's awful.

I know that I have offended a lot of people in the recent past with my more confrontational approach to conversations, but I have just one thought for what they think - fuck it! Really. I don't see why I should end up looking like the guilty party at every confrontation. There are a lot of instances when I'm right and there is no need for that fact to go unnoticed because I don't like confrontation. Of course, I'm not picking a fight with every person that walks down the bloody road. I just choose to tell people who are finding fault with me that they also need to look at what they're doing. If it makes them unhappy, well, just too bad.

Yes, of course, I do say and do stupid shit all the damn time. That doesn't mean I'm the only one doing and saying stupid shit.

I would like to dedicate the rest of 2012 to introspection. My initial goal was punctuality, but I've given up. I think introspection is a good idea this year, for me. 

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